finding meaning and ahhhh the pressure...

on location

I had to work out of town again all last week...it was a good job, but one of those all encompassing types, where I barely have time to think.  I feel lucky to squeeze in 10 minutes to skype with my babies at the end of the day.

and the pressure to keep up just slides away, plus trust me, you absatively do not want to hear about my work week!

Gman has been having a rough week/life at school for a variety of reasons.  Really it's all about basketball.  He is full of negativity and frustration. (side note: the kid is used to things being easy for him--straight A's forev babeeeee-- but he started basketball late in youth).  He isn't as good as he wants to be. The stinker is also your typical teenager and blaming a lot of things on others. Now for those of you that don't have the pleasure of knowing my wunderfewl boi, he's awesomesauce--just was down on his luck..Relying on yourself for your fulfillment is a lifelong lesson in my opinion...

This was a moment in life, where as a parent you have to dig down, down to a place you don't want to go readily.

You see, drama skeptics, when I was in high school, a senior in fact..I had a really hard time with a teacher I greatly loved and respected.   This falling out led to a lot of tension and me essentially failing at this activity.  Granted, I dropped the ball on this activity that was near and dear to my heart.  And I, was the reason I didn't win a silly award at the end of the year. The feelings I had of rejection and disappointment were so deep and a huge blow to my self esteem. 

Sitting and listening to someone you love, 'complain' but really try to tell you how they're hurting where they're at is so hard.  Harder than a colicky baby or the terrible twos.  A teenager is an entity unto themselves. And when your kid is at any age, but especially a teenager, you have to balance your involvement--you know it is the time where there are things they have to figure out for themselves. (this is something I have a particularly hard time with, as a single and neurotic parent--I am a mama bear, helicoptering herself and her views all over the poor children)

 I had this AHA moment, where I realized, I had to tell my son about the pain in my past.  In a way it sounds silly to write it out like this.  I'm so glad I told him though. I sat here on my couch and retold him the story of how I failed at something in high school, how much it hurt at the time and even for a long time after, but how I was a stronger person for it and how I realized the only person that could control those events then was the same person controlling the perspective now--ME.  In a way, it was like those events led me to this, to the chance to share and find meaning in my past.  Funny how finding meaning and forgiveness is something that takes years sometimes.  

how many years 'til this is my main transpo?!

Overheard...

This week we had an eye doctor appointment, a dentist appointment, trick-or-treating and good ol' fashioned playtime...

Emmy was NOT happy about the vision check-up...Lilly said to her, "don't worry Emmy, I'll be with you the whole time" 

In true form, Lilly was NOT happy about the tooth action...Emmy said, "it's ok Lil, I'll hold your hand while we're there"

collective awwwwwww

The girls were playing and from the kitchen I hear one say to the other--"oooh look, you tied him up Reee-aaallll good!"

The response? "I know!"

sooooo funny they are!

Gary made his JV basketball team this year--here's hoping for a great season!  It's going to be busy around these parts.  Can you believe how close we are to the holiday season!?

I received my first photo book in the mail--swoooooon!  I know peeps have been getting them for years, somehow I'm behind the trend...It is so awesomesuace, I may be gifting books to everyone this year! 

That and I'm already missing Disneyland...silly I know :)

Happy Halloweeeeeen!

Wow this year is going fast!

I missed the girls' party at school so I can't wait to see them in their costumes tonight.  

Emmy's First Halloween

Sometimes I feel so bogged down with my 'career' and like what to blog about when I'm working?  Can it really be interesting?  Hmmmm, one of the 'talent' did get really upset with me, to the point where he wanted to get me 'fired' hahaha, he didn't like that I held the purse strings. That and a haaauuuuge lack of sleep defined my work week.  

First Halloween candy--she was MAD when I took it away

I also got to spend some time with one of my favorite peeps in the whole wide world while I was gone, so that made up for missing the kiddies.

LB's first Halloween--can you tell how much she loved her costume?

We get a lotlotlot of trick or treaters.  I love all the costumes.  There's plenty of kids not even dressed up, but heck they need their sugar fix too right?  Actually this year I'm not doing candy, I have toy treats instead.  

Happy day before dia de los muertos to you!

**we interrupt this post**

to bring you the invasion of our humble abode

by aliens!!!

do not be fooled by this innocent look!

she may or may not have also brought the zombie apocalypse...

are you skeeeerrrrredddd?!

do not fret...

it's nothing a good hug can't fix!

Random week in Review

We got some pumpkins!  yay!  I love those big orange orbs! Since it's too early to carve them, they became an art project...so funny...

she painted all.over.herself...I think there may still be some purple in her hair...

  

she has figured out how to take pics with my iPhone :)

This is the one she took! Isn't it nice?!

they are now the 'centerpiece' on our table where we craft, because there's no room to...eat 
I like to think of these pumpkins as art--yanno Avant Gourde ;)

we watched Toy Story (and ignored the laundry)

Lookie Lookie!  We got some bunnies!

We actually got two sister (phew to no babies!) bunnies.  Really I should say rabbits, because they are two big girls. A good friend works at Petco where they had been given up, so we adopted them! 

 I am a little crazy I think, there are now 3 of the under-18 set and 3 of the four-legged set in the house. And I'm the only one that is neither! Yikes, am I outnumbered or what?  Who signed me up for this single adult thing!?

 (wanna feed my Evita-esque ego and be a follower? sign up right over there-----> 

and I'll give you candy or stickers or something!)

Injured--Bean Down Bean Down!

Less than two days before we left on our trip we had a guppy down for the count!

Yup, her first stitches!  She got into a fight with a bowling ball and the ball kept a chunk of her chin as proof.

You see...while I was with Gman, watching some swooshing...

the little ladies went bowling with their dad (another groupon usage--are you surprised in the least? and yes, me facilitating the quality time... but hey, at least the quality time was had)

my little bean ended up with four stitches, not so bad really.  Her dad had a really hard time with it, in fact I thought the doc was going to have to give him something to get through the stitches.

  Me? notsomuch...considering I counted how many I've had in my thirty odd years while we were waiting for the anesthetic to kick in and have you gotta guess as to how many? over 60! Yup!  Wacky right! Seven once without any anesthetic--there's a good story there for sure...

I was proud of her getting through it relatively calmy (in the just-turned-three-calm of course) granted they wrapped her in a sheet like a burrito and 'hid' her face with a  paper cover (like they have at the dentist to catch your spit!) to make the stitching easier.

Not sure if she'll have a big scar, but under her chin is not very noticeable dontcha think?

Does it make me a less sympathetic mother to not worry that she had to go through all that at such a young age?  I think it strengthens her and I tell ya what, she is one tough cookie!

The next day we went back to the nursery, 

so I could use yet another online deal coupon, and she seemed as perky and full of life as ever...at one point she attempted to tug one of their very large carts down the aisle, fell over, ended up covered in debris...she stood up, hands on her hips and boogied around the cart, so that she could 'order' her big bro to take it instead...

Lessons learned:
 1-facing a stressful situation with the ex factor is not terrible
2-rushing to use up a nursery coupon the day before you leave on a trip equals a terrible idea--the plants are still waiting to be planted this weekend...
3-oh and all these pics from my iprecious iphone don't look terrible on here--prepare yourself for more!

Pleasant Planting

Fun facts about me--

I am a shopper, luckily I like junky thrift stores.

I am mebbe a wee lil bit impulsive...

I am a member of the catalyst for impulsive shopping--Groupon...and Living Social...

I DO NOT have a green thumb...

(I really like the ellipsis...sue me...)

so I bought some cheap plant action and of course it just sat there in my inbox.  Finally, last weekend I went and bought some plants! Yippee!  Don't even ask how many circles I made around the nursery trying to look concerned with 'good' plants...even though I was really looking for something that wouldn't just keel over in the first month...

Anywho, enter in hearts and flowers...ohh, ahh...all together now...if you read past the first paragraph your ADD is better than mine.  I like it because it looks shiny :) and it is 'hardy' so mebbe I won't kill it like that plant that was there before it.

I planted them this morning, I was going to wait for the little ladies to help after school, but it's just too darn hot!

I dug forrrrrrevvvverrrr...can you tell...unimpressive I know...

planted those suckers...

ain't they purty?

like my octo watering system--yes that's official verbage

I hope they grow!  Oh and I have 2 more certificates to the nursery to use before Sunday...Yikes! Anyone wanna help a sister out with some planting and shopping for planting things...crickets...